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My Life in Curves

10/5/2010

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Like any typical high school sitcom or TV drama, there is a cast of characters representative of those we all remember well back in our highly pubescent years. My own personal cast included the jock, the” A” group, the ballers, the thin, the freckled and the pimpled.  As for me, I would have been cast as the chubby chick in the corner with the pretty face or the girl with the big personality and best friend in the time of need.  My size 12, 5”7 frame was considered to be not only undesired amongst the size 4 gals but also the butt of all fat jokes.  I was bullied, cheated on, mocked, bruised and broken by the time I graduated.  That’s when this fatty’s life in curves truly began.

This story isn’t an invitation to Tiff’s Pity Party but instead this is simply a message to those gorgeous thick chicks out there who share the same history as I.   I am of a representative of you and I carry you with me each and every single time I walk into a room chock full of conformity and social regularities which have made us the “lesser than” or the beauty minority.  I’m here to offer any inspiration to those yummy gals who were always told that they “had a pretty face for a big girl.” Its up to us to realize within ourselves that everything below our necks is just as beautiful and desired so that the rest of society can start re-arranging their lens.  It sounds cliché, but I personally taught myself how to love everything my mama gave me, starting from the inside out.   Walking confidently in your curves may not happen overnight but achieving it is very simple.  The secret to it is simply finding ways to FEEL good.  Once your insides are in that ‘feel-good’ state of mind believe me that your outside will look just as fine.  Another trick is to ACT brave even when you don’t feel brave because 9 times out of 10, NO ONE can tell the difference.  Don’t just wear what fits but instead get creative and put together something that is reflective of the current trends but hugs your curves in the right spots too.  Think sexy and you inevitably will be.

I left my mental weight back in California and flew out to NYC with a one-way ticket and a duffle bag hoping to be the victor in my never-ending game of hide and seek with my dreams.  I am now a plus-size model and have had the extreme pleasure and honor of working with some of the best folks in the plus industry.  I have modeled for designers such as Ashley Stewart, Lane Bryant, Monif C., Qristyl Frasier, Douglas Says and Robert Knight.  My modeling goals now are to try and target the more commercial audience and fulfill my future endeavors as an actress.   I am open to whatever God brings my way and will show and prove through my hard work and determination that I am deserving of that one open door.

I am now the product of a strange yet perfect recipe, ingredients including years of ridicule mixed and stirred with struggle, ownership, individuality and confidence.  Big girls, tell me what you have been through, what your desires are and ways we can turn our sexy inside-out.   I am by no means perfect or claim to have all the answers but I am, in the end, a fellow thick chick with a “pretty face” determined to make all of these chubbs, handles and lovin’ look good and help others realize their inner strengths.  This is my life in curves.


*I wrote this for an online lifestyle magazine
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