So...I was lucky enough to get an email from a friend late Wednesday night inviting me to a live music event called Hennessy Artistry . It was storming out and I literally was so close to going home right after work but something told me to go. When I walked into the venue I was in awe. The space was gorgeous, decorated with purple and blue lights everywhere and the dj was none other than DJ D-Nice. I told myself that I would leave by 10pm so that I could get home and get some rest before work. I was upset at the thought of possibly missing all the preformances but I knew I had to get my butt to bed. Literally 10 minutes later, The Roots got on stage and I was glued to stage left. GLUED I tell ya!
Then Q-Tip joined The Roots...and I've loved him for yearssss.....
And he was jammin'...
Then Mike Posner did his song "Cooler Than Me" which was fun!
So then, I looked to my right and who's there walking up the stairs to come on stage? Mr. Ron Isley himself...He smiled at me..swear
And then..the GORGEOUS Eve came out...can we just talk about her snake-skin corset? Thanks... And you can't see them but her heels were nuts!
And then! And thennnn!!!! I had to do a double-take on this one..but THEN Eryka Badu came on stage, super nonchalant and poised..nuts..and her voice was, I mean, dangerous..and amazing..and touching...and she did her set with The Roots and I was just GONE...
So then, just for fun, Bobby Brown showed up and he can really sing!!! AND he sang "My Prerogative" with The Roots and it was awesome...and his girlfriend was on stage cheering him on the whole time..pretty cute stuff...
So, at this point, I was chillin', mindin' my business..totally overwhelemed and couldnt believe all this was happening and I leaned over to my friend and said "you know, with all these people on stage wouldn't it be crazy if Mary J. Blige just came out..like out of no where..I would die"....and she smiled and agreed....and so, you know, the unthinkable happened....
Ummmm I very much spoke Mary J. freakin' Blige into existence!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! My mom laughs at me when I tell her she should speak what you want into existence and that trick apparently works with Mary J. Blige. I can't even tell you how I freaked out when she walked on stage. And she saw me shocked and started laughing..I feel like it was probably an endearing laugh (I hope) but either way, she saw my excitement and the chick really is superbly flawless in every aspect. And her husband was right there the whole time watching her off stage and helped her get down the stairs and everything. (Does he have a brother?) She was, sincerely, the highlight of my evening. She sang "Real Love" and I was DONE. DONE AND DONE I say!
So, long story short (not really but you have enjoyed it thus far) I couldn't feel my feet in my heels but I also didnt care much about the pain because I was front row center (well, more left) to a free show that included some of my favorite artist's. I've been wanting to see all of them preform for years and this was finally my chance. I understand fully that people pay hundreds of dollars to see all these artists separately preform and wait for months for tickets and wait in long lines for an opportunity to see them up close and personal and here I was at a free event because my friend happened to think of me. I am SO thankful to him for this opportunity and this night literally was one of the best NYC nights I've had to date. Thank you God, friend , all the artists and my new bff Mary for being SO incredibly awesome.
Oh and a big important P.S. I totally ran into the designer Richie Rich and asked him about a new plus-size line. He said "babygirl its coming out in Spring..I call it nutritious and delicious." As a plus gal who loves fashion, this, my friends, is a big deal. Just FYI. Get your stilettos and champagne ready for Fashion Week 2011.
Go Big or Go Home!
The reality is I have been in these curves for quite some time now. In fact, I can say confidently that I am a 10-year veteran. I had been rejected by men in the past because of my curves but I eventually learned to love them. One of the greatest days of my life was the day I woke up and looked at myself naked in my mirror and thought, “You know what, my dear, you ain’t lookin’ half-bad. In fact, you are a whole lotta good *ish* wrapped up in a tasty package.” (Yes, these conversations happen often) And this is what brings us here today.
I’m here to promote curves by raising my hands to the sky and yelling out to the world “GO BIG!!!!!” I know, I know. We all have different tastes and some of you just don’t prefer big chicks. That’s cool. I don’t prefer okra. It’s fair to have a difference in opinions and its totally fair to like what you like. I get it. But if you are a man who has never experienced the warmth of a woman’s ‘fullness’ then I personally feel that you really haven’t lived yet.
There is something very endearing about a woman with extra love around her legs, hips, tummy and, of course, her bum. At the risk of sounding very weird, I believe that every stretch mark, scar and imperfection is meant to tell a story and gives the body some character which, to me, ends up looking pretty perfect (on anybody for that matter). Curvy women who do it right and carry themselves with grace offer a unique confidence and sexy way about them that is truly irreplaceable by those less fortunate of the yummy goodness. We thick chicks have been through some difficult things which specifically have made us more in tune with the human form, the zones and the spots. We have had to explore outside of our measure on purpose, both physically and mentally, just to find a way to be comfortable in our skin. We have been tossed to the side and have had to find strength within ourselves to somehow manifest negative energy into something positive.
Having that said, don’t you think that a woman who comes with that sort of struggle and triumph may just be the most interesting and exciting partner you have ever had, mentally and physically? Go ahead and ask your boys who are fans of the rolls all about their experiences and see if they don’t already have a membership card. I am here speaking from experience and I have many a time been the first big girl that men were attracted to or at least interested in. And really, its about confidence...the walk and the talk. I'm not perfect and I definitely have insecurities but I introduce them to something new and different and offer a different perspective on life. I’ve been told that men acquire a taste for the thickness after spending time with me. *justsayin*
I think the moral of the story is that I have met some dudes recently who have never ever been with a thick chick, both emotionally and/or physically and I am simply here to say, “What are you waiting for?” Not only is it ok to look but if you ever felt self-conscious about what your friends might think of your reputation by having us on your arm, well, news flash boo…they love them a ‘thickie’ just as much as you do. If you still feel insecure about going big then just stick with what you like because your insecurities won’t be a good match for our confidence. We are grown folks and usually grown folks don’t let much get in the way. You will never know if you hate or love something in case you really try it and I’m a huge advocate for change in this day and age. Do me and my yummy friends a huge favor and take us out for a spin and report back to me on how that trip made you feel. I guarantee you will learn something about yourself you never knew and you may even unleash a side of you that you were just itching to let loose. We may be an acquired taste but you will be so very glad your palette was cleansed. I know this all to be true because I have lived it and see it every day. That's all I have to say about that.
*I wrote this for an online lifestyle magazine
For those of you who don't know, I work for an online magazine called PLUS Model Magazine. The video below pretty much explains it all. Enjoy loves!
My new show, TiffanyPlus, was featured in the PLUS Model Magazine blog and I couldn't be more excited! Thank you for all your love and support PLUS! And special thanks to all the great feedback! Much more to come soon!
My Life in Curves
Like any typical high school sitcom or TV drama, there is a cast of characters representative of those we all remember well back in our highly pubescent years. My own personal cast included the jock, the” A” group, the ballers, the thin, the freckled and the pimpled. As for me, I would have been cast as the chubby chick in the corner with the pretty face or the girl with the big personality and best friend in the time of need. My size 12, 5”7 frame was considered to be not only undesired amongst the size 4 gals but also the butt of all fat jokes. I was bullied, cheated on, mocked, bruised and broken by the time I graduated. That’s when this fatty’s life in curves truly began.
This story isn’t an invitation to Tiff’s Pity Party but instead this is simply a message to those gorgeous thick chicks out there who share the same history as I. I am of a representative of you and I carry you with me each and every single time I walk into a room chock full of conformity and social regularities which have made us the “lesser than” or the beauty minority. I’m here to offer any inspiration to those yummy gals who were always told that they “had a pretty face for a big girl.” Its up to us to realize within ourselves that everything below our necks is just as beautiful and desired so that the rest of society can start re-arranging their lens. It sounds cliché, but I personally taught myself how to love everything my mama gave me, starting from the inside out. Walking confidently in your curves may not happen overnight but achieving it is very simple. The secret to it is simply finding ways to FEEL good. Once your insides are in that ‘feel-good’ state of mind believe me that your outside will look just as fine. Another trick is to ACT brave even when you don’t feel brave because 9 times out of 10, NO ONE can tell the difference. Don’t just wear what fits but instead get creative and put together something that is reflective of the current trends but hugs your curves in the right spots too. Think sexy and you inevitably will be.
I left my mental weight back in California and flew out to NYC with a one-way ticket and a duffle bag hoping to be the victor in my never-ending game of hide and seek with my dreams. I am now a plus-size model and have had the extreme pleasure and honor of working with some of the best folks in the plus industry. I have modeled for designers such as Ashley Stewart, Lane Bryant, Monif C., Qristyl Frasier, Douglas Says and Robert Knight. My modeling goals now are to try and target the more commercial audience and fulfill my future endeavors as an actress. I am open to whatever God brings my way and will show and prove through my hard work and determination that I am deserving of that one open door.
I am now the product of a strange yet perfect recipe, ingredients including years of ridicule mixed and stirred with struggle, ownership, individuality and confidence. Big girls, tell me what you have been through, what your desires are and ways we can turn our sexy inside-out. I am by no means perfect or claim to have all the answers but I am, in the end, a fellow thick chick with a “pretty face” determined to make all of these chubbs, handles and lovin’ look good and help others realize their inner strengths. This is my life in curves.
*I wrote this for an online lifestyle magazine
The NYC life of a Cali girl.